Wednesday, February 28, 2007

It's a Flora World. We just live in it.

The Flora Juggernaut appears unstoppable. Our new book, The Curiously Sinister Art of Jim Flora, now in its 15th printing since publication a fortnight ago, leapfrogged two Harry Potter totboilers to perch Kong-like atop the New York Times Best-Seller list. Statues of the artist are currently being commissioned in his birthplace of Bellfontaine, Ohio, and in Rowayton, Connecticut, his adopted hometown. Premiere editions of the new U.S. Postal Service's Mambo For Cats first-class stamp became sold-out collector's items upon first day of issue.

Unfortunately, all has not gone smoothly: witness the crushing disappointment of thousands who purchased the Jim Flora Goats 'n Boats 2007 Hunk-a-Monka Wall Calendar. The calendar was discovered to be defective, with August preceding March, the June grid listing nine Sundays, and November—well, it was there when we sent files to the printer. Refund checks are in the mail. We apologize for the misprints and are working to improve our calendars to 99% accuracy by 2012. Meanwhile, please stay on the line. Your call is very important to us.

2 comments:

Ernie said...

Calendars can be tough. Twice in the past three years, I've found myself in the middle of Smarch, only to suddenly get the feeling that somthing is amiss...

Irwin Chusid said...

UPDATE: Our production staff recently discovered the source of one problem—a previously undiscovered 13th month ("Julembuary"). This was wreaking havoc with the auto-sequencing feature which ordinarily enables conventional monthly succession. The unnecessary month has been deleted, and succession now seems to be functioning in normal default mode. Staff was encouraged and went out to play badminton and sip Mai Tai's.